Top Self-Belief Barriers of Women

Most of our barriers as women are in our own minds!

Well, yes, I know we women are affected more than men by genderism and agism and sexism. I mean, try finding a new job as a woman over 50. It’s not easy for sure. That’s why so many women go out on their own and battle with the entrepreneur game, which has its own challenges. It is also why women 50+ is the highest growing homeless group … but that’s a whole other topic.

That said, the biggest challenges we face come from our own subconscious – our inner self-belief system.

Who has ever thought “I’m not good enough!”?

Yep most of us. It’s the biggest limiting self-belief almost all women have, at least at some stage of their life.

From that one limiting self belief, many others come into play too:

• • Imposter syndrome – I don’t belong here

• • I’m not important, worthy, deserving or just not enough

• • Fear of being too much – too bossy, ambitious, demanding

• • I must be perfect – to prove myself

• • Fear of failure

• • I’m invisible

• • I’m powerless

To name a few.

Do you relate to any of these?

Well, you are not alone.

Women in leadership positions are particularly vulnerable to imposter syndrome.

 

A 2020 study by KPMG found that 75% of executive women across industries have experienced imposter syndrome at various points during their careers.

A 2022 Women in the Workplace report by McKinsey revealed that 1 in 3 women in leadership roles often feel like they don’t belong or question their abilities.

Why do we have these inner barriers more than men?

Men are encouraged to:	Women are encouraged to:
Be bold, strong, confident, assertive, ambitious and self-assured	Be demure, well-behaved, humble and self-less and more sensitive
Win and be a winner – take risks and learn from failure	Be perfect – avoid taking risks and making mistakes
Focus on what they do well and self-promote	Stand back and not be too pushy
Be more selfish with their time and priorities	Be nurturing and self-sacrificing care-takers and people-pleasers

Research (and experience) has shown that women are judged and penalised for being ambitious and assertive and are labelled as aggressive.

This all adds up to women prioritising being perfect – just look at the women’s magazines and advertisements for women. Hence we tend to internalize even small criticisms, and take them personally as we do with failure too.

So if we add all this conditioning into the mix of the environment we grew up in, we end up with several unmet needs in our life. When we have an unmet needs, we make a decision at the time about what that means – about our self and who we are and what we are worth, forming our subconscious self beliefs.

That then is expressed in our behaviour – which often comes from these decisions made in our past and which we are not even aware of in the present. These are compensating behaviours which we adopt subconsciously in an attempt to get this unmet need satisfied.

Most of these compensating behaviours do not benefit us in our lives now.

Those beliefs and resultant behaviours create our own barriers to success, like an inner glass ceiling.

Overcoming These Barriers

Breaking through these self-belief barriers requires a combination of introspection, self-awareness, intentional action and support from a mentor or coach. Here are a few steps to start:

1. 1. Identify and Challenge Your Limiting Self Beliefs: Recognize when you’re experiencing imposter syndrome, perfectionism, or fear of self-promotion. Remind yourself of your achievements and worth – working with a coach really helps here because this is hard to do while you have this inner belief that you aren’t good enough.

2. 2. Reframe your Self-Belief: Explore the self-belief to identify why your subsconscious beliefves this about yourself. Once you are aware, the next step is to identify what you need to change the belief to. This is the most critical breakthrough process and it is very difficult to do on your own. You will need an objective guide to help you.

3. 3. Embrace Your Ambition: Reframe ambition as a positive trait and give yourself permission to go after what you want unapologetically.

4. 4. Be Prepared to Take Calculated Risks: Understand that failure is a stepping stone to success. Taking risks, even small ones, will build your confidence and resilience. Remember, failing is a part of succeeding and not a personal reflection of you.

5. 5. Practice Self-Promotion: Regularly acknowledge your achievements and share  and celebrate them confidently, knowing that your voice deserves to be heard.

6. 6. Set Clear Boundaries: Prioritize your well-being by setting limits on what you take on. Saying “no” is an act of self-care, not selfishness.

Well that’s so easy to say, isn’t it?

But when we are dealing with subconscious patterns that have become our normal way of thinking and being, it’s not just a matter of changing our minds and doing something different … because these beliefs are ingrained in the neural pathways in our brain and hold us back from reaching our full potential.

To truly transform we must reset our beliefs at a subconscious level first and retrain our brains to think and behave in a different way!  And the way to do that is through personal development and coaching. A good coach will help you to delve deep to identify the sources of your beliefs and behaviours. They can then support and guide you to become aware that that belief is no longer true in your life, or of yourself. That is the way to breakthrough our limiting beliefs – by changing them into believing in our full potential.

The next step is to implement new behaviours in our life is to take actions that support our new found beliefs and confidence in pursuing our dreams.

This journey requires courage, and it’s not for everyone. You need to be able to face your inner most fears, and let go of your shame. It’s not an overnight journey, but it is an exciting one that has the most amazing rewards in creating extraordinary results in your life.

 

Women have incredible strength and potential, but these self-belief barriers hold them back from fully realizing it – like an inner glass ceiling. By discovering and breaking through these barriers, you can :

• • step into your full power

• • take control of your direction

• • drive the success and fulfilment you desire – and deserve